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I feel so out of control, like my mind its totally disconnected from my body, and my emotions are crazy... Shifting from being completely normal, to feeling so damn low and sad... like so down in a hole, buried deep in shit... Its so weird to try to do things right at work, or talk to someone else about basic stuff, seems to be so unimportant right now... I feel like I have no priorities that actually matter, and my life expectations are none, they crumbled to the ground and now I don't know how to pick anything up, and from where?! My future has never been so uncertain or so hopeless, ever... I have no time nor focus to put on anything but the fact that I'm down... so down... drowning in my own desperate thoughts and unwilling shitty emotions towards you, you son of a bitch... You fucking killed me, and now I don't know how to come back from death! I feel disarmed, vulnerable, lonely, desperate, weak, hopeless, and without any will to keep doing this routine stuff a...

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